Well, its been a couple of days since my last post. Things are going great. My love and I are gooey in love. I have great friends and family. Life is pretty damn good. I’m trying to liquidate some old car parts and got a text today about a guy who is interested in the biggest piece. We’ll see how that turns out. Hope to test drive my car as soon as next weekend. Fingers crossed.
That’s it lovelies. How are you doing?
Love
Had a grand time Saturday. For the first time in a few months, my cousin came over to hang out. X and Cootie were in house and the Mogwai was asleep with a bum ankle. We started the night out with myself trying to cook something new and delicious in a wheat free world. X has a wheat allergy. My love Haley has a wheat allergy. She gets sniffles and X stops breathing. Two very important people in my life with the same allergy, albeit at varying degrees of severity. So I’ve been trying to help in any way I can. People know this, peanut allergies, milk allergies and pepper allergies don’t hold a candle to living with a wheat allergy. Name your 3 favorite foods.
Ok, now lets say that you said Pizza, beer, Hamburgers, Biscuits and Gravy, Lasagna, cookies, spaghetti, candy bars, thai food, chicken lo mein, or a nice big sandwich.
Now imagine that you can’t eat those things as they come, as they are served by every restaurant and every house in the nation. Wheat is in everything. It binds things together that you would never think would have wheat in them.
Haley had a pack of SUCKERS. Caution: Contains Wheat. What the fuck for?
I’m a big eater, if you couldn’t tell by my stature… So the pure shock of thinking about not being able to stop at McDonalds and get a burger on the run. To not have a normal birthday cake. So hell yeah, I will go out of my way to try to help in any way I can. So to these ends, I attempted to make some ground chicken sausage balls for a snack.
Yeah, after grinding it up and realizing that chicken doesn’t have the consistency that pork or beef does, I changed mid-stroke and went with a chicken meatloaf. I don’t know if anyone has ever done this before, I’m sure it has. I’m not trying to blaze new paths in food, but I was pretty proud of the finished product. It was moist, but heavy. I needed a little more spices, salt mainly, because I wasn’t sure of the level of salt in the gluten-free cornbread mix that I used. I love cooking though, so I was happy.
By this time, the drinks were flowing and I was missing my girl pretty bad. When we wrapped dinner, poured some more drinks and gathered around the table to introduce Drew to Apples to Apples, I was feeling melancholy. I don’t like being away from Haley. I am madly in love with this woman. I feel empty when she’s not with me. But I was surrounded by people I love and who love me, so I couldn’t complain about the company. After the first round, my face was already hurting from laughing. Drew’s sick mind fit in well in our group and fun was had by all. When we finally called it a night and I retrieved a blanket for Drew to crash on the couch with, I went right to sleep.
I woke up at 10 and immediately got a text from Haley, like she could sense that I was part of the waking world again. It said simply “Good morning! Been up since 545, almost done with laundry. I have homemade waffles waiting for you whenever you get up. Love you!” What a wonderful good morning. I promptly made Drewcifer and myself a cup of coffee and took off to Haley’s. I got greeted with a hug, a kiss and a “I missed you” which fills me with so much joy it’s probably sickening to people that haven’t experienced it.
I haven’t had a good track-record with relationships. I’m not 30 yet (for a couple months) but I’ve already been married and divorced. I am a statistic. Regardless what you’ve seen in the news, Facebook was not to blame for my divorce. I rushed in. I ignored signs that I shouldn’t have. I made a mistake. But it hurt me. It burned me and made me bitter. I’ve swore that I will never marry again since then. I’m not saying that I’m ready for that right at this moment, but when I think about my future, I can’t think about Haley not being in it. I love this woman. She has opened my heart and my eyes. I now know what it’s like to have someone that you truly care about and can expect the same thing from in return. Is she my soulmate? I dunno if I believe in that mumbo-jumbo, but I’m saying this: I’ve let her go once and she came back. I’ll not make that mistake again. It’s 1 o’clock in the morning now.
I am not in bed yet, because I miss the thought of being able to put my arm around her and have her snuggle up to my chest. She’s my lobster.
Have a good rest of the weekend, everyone. I am off for MLK Day and I will spend it doing laundry, playing Batman and missing my girl.
Love.
Love.
That’s right, love. Love and myself haven’t always gotten along. Usually I rush in, more for the idea behind love than for the actual emotion. The idea of being in love and the benefits that come with it entice more than whores on the steps of a temple.
Formally my thoughts on love were simple and juvenile. Love meant having someone care about you. Love meant getting things from someone “just because”. It meant sex. It meant that you had someone to do things with, you were never alone. Love was a MySpace update.
What I have learned is that Love, true Love is none of that.
True love is knowing that your wife is sick and determining to make her life as easy and full as possible. True love is taking in and raising 3 kids and making them excel at school when they had no support from the birth mother. True love is changing your entire diet because you husband has a severe allergy to a VERY common food source.
Love is sacrifice.
Love is worshiping your partner.
Love is kissing like no one is watching.
Love is not monetary. It cannot be bought.
True love cannot be forced.
I am lucky that I have finally figured this out. I am also lucky to have fallen in love with a wonderful woman who loves me as purely as I love her.
I love you, Haley. Sorry it took me so long to figure out.
~Sco
So my creative juices got severely dampened by my pseudo-vacation. I didn’t do much except lay around and watch movies and tv. Sure we can blame the pain pills, but the truth is that I felt myself running dry. I began to have moments of writers block that lasted for days. When finally I could create again, I had so much built up that it came pouring out like word diarrhea. I wasn’t happy with much that I did in those times.
So, I changed tactics. I went back to my original love, drawing. I hadn’t put pen-to-paper in a long time aside from tattoo ideas for other people. So I created some things that had been floating in my head for awhile. I also took up a new hobby. I self-taught myself to make chainmail jewelry. What tedious, mind numbing work. But I was proud of that first piece. It was nice to hold something tangible in my hands and think “I made this out of nothing.”
How creationist of me, eh?
The world needs more beauty in it. We are barraged, as a society, by images of war, violence, civil unrest and poverty. Daily I have to suffer through an ASPCA commercial showcasing beaten and neglected animals. The news never shows “feel good” stories anymore. No Zippy, the water skiing squirrel. No puppies or lolcats. No, instead I have to hear someone is being mistreated, another baby was killed by an enraged or deranged parent, the president/congress/state representatives aren’t doing their jobs.
I get it.
We live in a fucked up world. We are too concerned with shiny trinkets, celebrity marriages and what else gives you cancer. People have forgot how to enjoy life. A powerful phrase that I read years ago still sticks with me.
“Life isn’t forever”
That’s right people. You, I, our lived ones, our pets, even that asshole neighbor that let’s his dog shit in your yard are all going to die. Life DOESN’T last forever. There’s only one certainty in life. Death. One day its all over.
I’ll be 30 this year. If the Mayan Doomsayers are wrong, (they are) I will probably live for 40-45 more years. I’m not going to be a 90 year old man. It’s not in my genes. I am overweight, I smoke, I drink, I drive too fast and I don’t wear my seat belt. I’ll be lucky to hit 70. So almost half of my life is over. You know what I have learned recently? I haven’t began to live yet. My life has been relatively normal, but I have always held myself back. I’ve worried about money, I’ve worried about the future. You know that saying “can’t see the forest for the trees”?
That’s me in a nutshell.
So I am saying fuck new years resolutions. I’m making new life resolutions.
1.) Inspire myself and others. It’s too easy to be grumpy and plod along daily. I will take a moment every day and try to make myself or someone else better.
2.) Leave an impact on the world. Now I’m not saying I will discover the cure to a disease or solve a great mystery, but dammit when I die, someone will miss me on more than an emotional level.
3.) Love and be loved. I am blessed to have a beautiful woman in my life who makes me stupid happy. I am going to try my damnedness to keep her. I will strive to never take her for granted.
4.) Don’t sweat the small stuff. Simple enough. Live to the fullest. Don’t let shit drag me down.
So there you have it. Will I succeed every day? Fuck no, I’m only human, but I’m going to try really hard.
So throw all the bad news and 90s folk music-backed puppies you want at me, world. I’m going to weather your storm. I’m going to thrive. I will not let the next 30 years pass as meekly by.
As Wheezy would say, I’m gonna make life my bitch and put my hand up her skirt.
Love.
Today is my 28th birthday. I was born on May 25th 1982. I like my birth year, because it makes subtraction easy for when I forget how old I am. I like the day because I share it with a great man. My sister began dating a guy when we lived in South Knoxville. His name was Robby. I was a young impressionable kid. I had never been around an older guy besides my father, grandfathers, uncles, etc. Robby was a big guy. Yes I mean this in a figurative way, he was very overweight. He was also bigger than life. He drove a big ass tank of a car. It had speakers that would rattle the windows of the house. He smiled a lot. He had the most peculiar laugh. More of a titter, a tee hee, but with a giggle. He was in high school at Gatlinburg-Pittman. He was so cool, and I instantly had a “big brother”. I did the annoying little brother thing of trying to hang around all of the time. I know it got on my sisters nerves, but Rob never seemed to mind. At least maybe in my idolizing mind, it just seemed that way. Rob would joke, he would cut up, he would rib me. He was also terrified of my dad and respectful of my mom. He and my sister dated for a long time. They broke up, got back together, and broke up over and over. A typical high school relationship. Unfortunately, it was destined to not work out. Though Rob was around for a long time, they eventually split for good, but stayed in contact and remained good friends. He still loved her, I could tell that later in the years when he would talk about her.
My favorite thing about Rob “The Boyfriend Years” – Rob, was a huge football fan. He knew the entire roster of the New Orleans Saints. It blew my mind that he rooted for a team that he had no connection to. He is the reason I found it ok to root for Alabama in a house full of Tennessee fans. So because he was a Saints fan, I became a Saints fan. I got a roster pack of trading cards. When he showed up one day, I thought “Boy, Rob is gonna think this is cool!” So I pulled out the cards, said, “Hey Rob, check it out. I got these cards, it even has a Bobby Hebert card.” Now when I said this, I said it as HE-BURT, instead of with the appropriate “Nawlins” dialect of AI-BEAR. Rob began to laugh, and I swear it lasted for 30 minutes. From that point on, I was Bert. Like Reynolds or Lancaster. He never called me Mark, Markie, etc. It was always Bert. For those first couple of weeks it was Bert, followed by the tittering laugh.
Rob always battled his weight issue. It eventually got to the point that he was unable to drive and spent a lot of time in his house. I hadn’t stayed in constant contact with him, but we reconnected after I moved up to Pigeon Forge and began working at a hotel. I hung out with him a lot. I talked to him on the phone, he was my family away from family. I would spend entire days at his house, watching TV, messing with people on WebTV chat, smoking, and talking. We talked about all kinds of stuff. We were the “What If…” types of guys. “Dude, wouldn’t it be cool if…”
Rob got his first computer, a Dell. I introduced him to file sharing. We downloaded so much music that first week. We must have went through a 20 pack of CDs. He would laugh at the random movie quotes that I would put in between songs. That was mostly what the computer was used for. Downloading music, mostly old skool R&B, Rap, some Rock, new Hip Hop, and movie quotes. We’d sometimes go out in his SUV. A Chevy Suburban with a 454. He couldn’t drive, but I could. He’d sit in the passenger seat, we’d get it washed, then burn a tank of gas driving around, listening to music, visiting his friends, and such. That truck was a fuckin beast. It had so much power and he loved showing off to people. We’d sit in his house, smoke, bullshit, mess with his cats Druff (A white cat, as in Dandruff) and Sooty (A black cat, as in coal soot) and just be friends. He stopped just being my sister’s ex. He became my friend. He was there for me no matter what.
I went to a party on Ski Mountain. It was my 3 girl friend’s birthdays, all being celebrated together. The first night, my friend Sarah (where do I start) got very drunk. I literally had to watch over her, as there were less than savory guys that were attempting to use this to their advantage. I didn’t drink, just so someone had a level head. Well, technically Stace didn’t drink either, but that’s because she was like 7 months pregnant. The place got DESTROYED. There were fights, naked drunk girls passed out everywhere, the pool balls were thrown into the woods, the hot tub had no water left in it, but some yellowish fluids with shit floating in it. The next night was supposed to be chill, take it down a notch. Next thing you know, this girl who I loved for years and would do anything for is topless in a hot tub making out with a guy that she didn’t know, oblivious to the risk she was taking. I lost it. I couldn’t watch it. I left. It was 4 in the morning, raining, and I was in a Mini-Van. Needless to say I slid most of the way down Ski Mountain. I got into Gatlinburg and thought “Well shit, now what am I gonna do? I can’t go home, it’s too late/early.” (Dad’s rule) I called Rob. “Dude, can I come over, I have had a shitty night and I just need a space to crash for a couple of hours.” 10 mins later, we’re sitting in his living room, smokin a bit, so I would calm down. Rambling about how much I love her and how she couldn’t give a shit about it. How I will always be stuck in the “Friend Zone”. Rob told me, I’ll never forget it, that “Bert, you have to make her realize. You need to tell her. You can’t let that stay like it is, it’ll bother you forever.” He went back to bed and I curled up in his oversized leather recliner and went to sleep. The next day, I didn’t take his advice. Hell, I still haven’t taken his advice. Never did tell her. Too late now, we don’t speak. He was right, of course. As painful as the possibility of rejection is, I wish I would have taken that advice and just told her. For the record, it still does bother me.
When I needed $500 bucks to get an engine for a car, Rob had it. “No problem, Bert, come over after work.” He was a giver. He would do anything for me. I could have asked him for anything and if it was in his power, I have no doubt that he would have done it.
Rob got gastric bypass. He dropped weight like crazy. Unfortunately, he got an infection and on February 22, 2004 Rob passed away. I had moved jobs, and moved houses. I wasn’t in contact with him like I had been. I didn’t even know he was sick. I never got to say goodbye to him. It still bothers me. I have never grieved for him. I think it’s because I never got to tell him thank you for all that he did, so I’ve never wanted to accept it. The way he influenced my life, the great times we had. His sage like advice followed up with a “Shruh Shruh Shruh” and a flutter of the hand. His crazy fuckin neighbor, code-named ”3D or Da Da Dee” for the way that he would trail off and instead of saying “Etcetera” he’d say “Da Da Dee, Da Da Daa” The Burban. The LX Mustang (LX_Tasy). The Cordoba. The cats. His crazy family. His love of my sister. The fact that I don’t think we ever had an argument (outside of him bitchin at me for being mean to Tish when I was younger). I wish I could have had the chance to tell him that he was a great person. I am sorry that he had to go. I don’t know if I believe in any afterlife, but if there is one I hope I get to see him again…
Daniel Robert Ogle would have been 34 today. Happy Birthday, Robby. I miss you.
- Bert
So in the last 7 days I have had a great time for the first time in a while.
My sister gave me my Birthday present early. I got a year subscription to www.marvel.com . Please note that this means I have UNLIMITED DIGITAL COPIES of comics from way back to nearly current. One of the coolest and most well thought gifts I have ever got. I have the best Sister in the world. She doesn’t get told enough, but I love her and I don’t know what I would do without her.
I got to have dinner and movie with my favorite family (outside of my own). The Darkling was there, which is awesome. He makes me act like a teenager. The kid is amazing. Upon receipt of a bag of Starburst, X immediately layed out the “Dad” chant of “Don’t eat those before dinner or you won’t eat.” The boy responds, “Ok.” Upon entering the room 5 mins later, he already has a small pile of wrappers, as he shows me his funny comments on Google Maps for places like Little Caesars Pizza. He plays DC vs MK on the 360, while I bitch about how Superman could never get “Get Over Here”-d by Scorpion, or why Hal Jordan doesn’t get to make a giant hammer and splat Johnny Cage. Mogwai came out of her room long enough to take the offering of Skittles, a vegi-burger, and then she was gone again. I seem to remember that being the common actions of a teenage girl (regardless of how many times a little brother knocks and requests entry). X and Cootie were of course awesome hosts. They smooch and adore each other a lot. I don’t mind it because I can tell that it is 100% honest and truthful, it’s refreshing from a standpoint of every relationship I have been in has been a web of lies. We watched the first half of a 70′s killer bee b-movie with Sir Michael Caine (one of my fav British actors) until the Wii-Netflix got caught in some sort of time loop. These friday nights have been deemed Nargles due to another 70′s movie (I can never remember the names) that had these little dwarf people who I instantly termed Nargles. They aren’t the invisible, mischief-loving creatures from Potter’s world. These are beady-red eyed lil bastards that are slaves to the giant thin man. Trust me, you should check it out. So born was Nargles, the term for movies that we watch in the instant queue from Netflix. Usually Horror, usually older than I am, and always infinitely awesome.
Saturday was my Dad, Mom, and I being wheeled and dealed by a carnival barker at the Dirt Mall. He talked us all out of a little bit of money, but we walked away with a bunch of knock off shit (Ginsu, Shamwow, Slap Chop) and a DeWalt palm sander w/ bag attachment for my dad for Father’s Day. Got help from my Sis to clip CVD’s nails. Felt bad about his displeasure of this, so I went out and spent $25 on treats for him. Came home, and played WOW with my guild (Bradford, Anthony, Drewcifer), and passed out on the couch.
Sunday was a day of Wal-Mart and Sam’s Club with the Parents, beef on the grill, my first “Pickleback” (whiskey and dill pickle juice. It’s amazing, so don’t even scowl), and then a little WOW.
Monday morning I placed an order for a refurbished DELL computer, 2 gigs of RAM, 360 GB HD, 2.4 G Intel Celeron processor, and DVD burner. I got it from www.cedarPC.com check them out. They refurbish old comps, and sell them for great cheap prices. If you don’t need speakers, keyboards, monitors, etc, it can be a great deal. Got mine for $130. The one problem is that they are first come first serve, and not in any way custom. That means that I am now the proud owner of a Purple faced Dell. So far, I love it. New to Window’s Vista, so I am still feeling around, but it’s fast, and easy to use, and very quiet. Monday day I went to work. It sucked. Next.
Tuesday was another early B-Day present. See I have very few true friends. 2 of them are married to each other. They started dating because I stood her up for a date and she wanted something to still do since she had found a babysitter. Now they’re married, have their first child together (who’s adorable), and live relatively close to me. Unfortunately, we don’t get to hang out so much because Phil’s got odd hours working in a motorcycle shop, moonlighting in his garage as a mechanic (he’s went to school for it). Tanielle is going to school (graduated today! Congrats, T) then when she’s home, she’s a mommy. Well for one night, we were fuckin kids again. Phil and I used to roadie for a rock band in town. They were a great bunch of guys but like most of the bands out there, they had commitment issues and broke up. While they were going, Philly and I would carry all of their shit, set up stuff, get waters, bang groupies (haha I wish), and stand around looking menacingly at any drunk assholes (easy to do when we each stand 6’5″+ and 275+ lbs). It was a great time of my life, because I love music and it allowed me to be near that scene. So Tuesday night we (Philly, Tanielle, T’s Mom, Drewcifer, and myself) went and saw Alice Cooper and Rob Zombie in concert. It was pure, metal, mind fucking, rock and roll. Cooper puts on the greatest stage show (cheesy special effects and ACTING), and I am happy that I got to see him perform in my life. Zombie was in a word, FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC. I couldn’t rip my eyes from the stage as he went through a lot of my favorite White/Rob Zombie songs, with Hentai, B&W horror movies, Suspiria-esque lighting, pentacles, fire, and a GIANT FUCKING ROBOT! I re-affirmed my love for Zombie that night. Since then, I have not been able to stop singing/humming/whistling…
Mars Needs Women…
Angry Red Women.
Heh. As X said today, it’s the cheesiest line and makes no sense, but goddamn it’s catchy. Thank you again for the awesome birthday Phil and Tanielle, I will never forget that show. I had such a good time, that I chose NOT to punch the Peyton Manning jersey-wearing douche bag that spilt his beer down my back. As easy as I could have beat the fuck out of him, nothing could have ruined that night. Came home and played some WOW with Drewcifier to try to wind-down from the natural high of a great concert.
Wednesday morning was more WOW with Drewcifier, we were joined late by Bradford. We left, and spent the entire drive to get my car talking about and quoting Holy Grail, 40 Yr Old Virgin, Knocked Up, The Hangover, Role Models, etc. I click with that kid like no one else. We are very much alike. He is physically the exact opposite of me, but mentally, we’re the brain trust of our family (Scary, huh?) I bought a new book (Zombie Combat Manual), played some WOW and took a nap with CVD, WOW in the eve, then off to bed.
Today, my comp came. I have spent the last 5 hours re-installing everything that I need. WOW, BitTorrent, Blog roll, RSS Feeds (Thanks Mena for the explanation), setting short cuts, home pages, iTunes, ringtone creator, Big Bang Season 3, etc. So far, I love my purple computer. I think I will name it Baron Zemo. Or take X’s suggestion and paint the shell bright ass green, and make it look like the Joker would want it.
I have had a fuckin good week. I hope you all have too. Now if I could just get laid….
Until next time, True Believers…
Well, I know it’s been some time since I rolled out a new blog. My friend reminded me that in all of the “Wootingness” of getting the internet (not just on my phone) I still had not put up a blog. She’s right. I have no excuse. It’s pure laziness and my newfound addiction to WOW.
That’s right, motherfuckers. My nerd penis got just a smidge bigger. I’ve been on for a little over a month. So far I have a Lv 51, a Lv 29, and a Lv 28. Variety is the spice of life. Not much else has been going on.
I feel like my job is dragging me down. I leave there every day and just want to scream until my throat tears. One positive is that I have an afternoon carpooler, in X. It definately makes the first half of the drive home much more enjoyable. We talk about random bullshit, movies, people we hate, things we like, just shoot the shit for a nice 20 min drive. It makes me feel almost human.
My mom is still doin ok, she’s on a steady medication and we are all hopeful that it helps. Her and dad are closer, and it seems to frustrate mom that she can’t do things like she used to, but it’s nice to see my parents spending time with each other. I really wish I could send them on the Alaskan cruise that they have wanted for years. Maybe I can sell a kidney or a testicle.
Not like I currently have a use for my testicles. We were at a family function and my cousin (the douchey one that no one likes)’s wife was there. She is adorable, for a midget. She said that she was working on finding me a girlfriend. My immediate response “I don’t want one.” Now, understand that I love women. I love sex, I love waking up next to someone. I just really really don’t give a large enough shit about being with anyone right now. I guess maybe I have had shitty luck. The relationships I have had weren’t good. So this leads me to not wanting to even waste the fuckin energy anymore. I’ll keep you posted.
Charlie is doing good, he’s as rotten as ever. He isn’t bad when it’s just him and I, but if I have anyone over, he turns into a little asshole. My dad said that he’s my monster and that he’s going to call the Dog Whisperer. If some little Spanish guy shows up to talk about my dog like he understands him completely, I may go “Gacy” don’t worry, I’ll post pics. 
I really am working on getting my basement cleaned up and getting some shit thrown out. Anyone got a spare dumpster? I wanna be able to entertain some guests, maybe cook out, who knows. Just gotta buckle down and do it.
I planted a garden. Actually 3 gardens. Or patches? Patches I think. I have a cantalope patch, a strawberry patch, and a large pepper patch. WOOOO. So far so good. Everything has broke ground, the pepper plants got topped by some goddamn deer that are obviously challenging me to “Bambi’s Mother” them.
Saw Iron Man 2 and Kick-Ass. 2 of my must see movies for the summer. I was 100% impressed with both of them. Go see them. They are good. I was never a big Iron Man comics fan, I read some Avengers and I kept familiar with the ‘goings-on” of Tony Stark, but I was always more into X-Men. Something about the movies though, damn I wanna be Iron Man. Hey, Happy Hogan got to wear the goddamn suit, why not me?
So that’s all that’s going on in my life. I really don’t have much to talk about. I am thinking of (re)starting a blog-by-chapter story, but I am not sure I have the drive. I have good ideas, but I am not sure I wanna follow through.
So today I rearranged my entertainment center. I now have plugged up and working an NES, a Sega Genesis, a Sega Dreamcast, a Microsoft Xbox, and a Microsoft Xbox 360. Under the EC, in the cabinet, sets 2 Nintendo 64s, a Sony Playstation, and another Dreamcast. I have roughly 20 NES games. What really makes me happy? I found, at a garage sale, The Adventures of Link, in the golden case. NICE! My walls are covered in movie posters. Mallrats, J&SB Strikes Back, Taken, Ledger’s Joker, a b&w Mallrats, Silk Spectre 2, American History X, and the foldout map of the Capital Wasteland for Fallout 3. Decorations are dragon themed, a Silent Bob bobblehead (aka Däs Mëtäl Trëë Topper) and on multiple surfaces Gaming Books.
“You mean like strategy guides?”
HEY, WHO’S TELLING THIS FUCKIN STORY???
Actually yes, there are strategy guides. But there are also Pen and Paper game books. See waaaaaaaaay back in the 70′s, a man named Gary Gygax and some other peoples created a game called Dungeons and Dragons. From those days on, nerds everywhere had things to do on Friday nights. And also from that point, these nerds have been mocked! I don’t fit the normal “nerd” profile. First of all, I am built like a football lineman. Secondly, I don’t have glasses, a retainer, or pocket protectors as society portray those of the geek persuasion. And lastly, I like sports, cars, fishing, and fine art.
It’s like somewhere along the lines, someone made the decision that if you play D&D, you have to be a pasty, pimple riddled, virgin of Potsy like preportions.
My first argument to the blank look and response of “You play D&D?” (Said with the same emphasis as one would say, “You ate a baby?”) is to ask if the offended questioner plays video games. Lets face it, in the age of electronics that we live in, you would be hard pressed to find anyone under 30 who doesn’t play video games. Now maybe they aren’t having weekly 72 hour Evercrack runs, but even if they just get together to play “only macho games” like Madden (and hate fuck each other). The difference between the game on your TV and the game on your table top, is the picture. A Pen and Paper (any table top game played with die and player record sheets) game is played in your mind. You can use miniatures to represent your characters, but it is like you and friends are writing a book as you go along.
Not everyone can play Pen & Paper, it takes someone with the imagination to make for a deep story.
I have been playing regularly for the last 7 years or so. I also played some in middle school. Now of course Christian groups have attacked D&D for as long as it’s been around. Saying that it fucks kids up and makes them think that they can do things that end up getting themselves hurt. Seriously, if any kid thinks that he can jump off of a building and float down to the ground unhurt or make themselves immune to fire, they are already fucked up. That isn’t a games fault, its the parents, breeding, or upbringing.
I have learned a lot through gaming, it has made me quicker thinking, reactive, proactive, and more decisive.
Geeks run this world. We know more, we can do more, we are deeper, and ladies I assure you that a geek will work harder at pleasing you than a jock. So if you want some fun that you can play with your family or friends, pick up a Pen and Paper. There are smaller games that are easy to get into. I would recommend a box starter set. If you want a fun and funny game, Munchkins. Go to Nord’s Games or Sci-Fi City and ask for Munchkins, spend $25 and have hours of entertainment.
So give geeks a chance. And if you are a geek yourself, let your Nerd Flag fly. Admit your love of Q Bert, Excite Bike, and Spy Hunter. Claim your homeland of Faërun, Ansalon, or one of the planes. Profess your love for dragons and dungeon crawling, swords and shields, wizards and witches, hobbits and orcs, Jedi and Sith, Muggles and Mudbloods.
Geeks are Gods among mortals. FTW!
